Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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