By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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