I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize