I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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