haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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