i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
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Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
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There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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