well I can't set my house on fire every night
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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