Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
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I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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