I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
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My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
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Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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