sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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