I am puke
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
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