i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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