Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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