I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
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