Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
God I need to hump something, right now.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize