he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
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She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
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He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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