she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
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One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
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Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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