By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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