there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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