Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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