your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
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when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
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THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I supernannyed him into submission
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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