This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
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