what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
God I need to hump something, right now.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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