farters have to be the big spoon...
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize