Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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