smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
