it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
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Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
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You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize