Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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