Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize