yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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