i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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