well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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