i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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