he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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