what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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