so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
A+ Viking dick
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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