their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
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i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
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that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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