I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
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