Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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