you guys were way drunker than both of me
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize