He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize