i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize