I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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