Don't make out with my wife yet
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize