puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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