how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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