How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
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A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
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You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
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