I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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