You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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