I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I know her cup size but not her name....
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